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marriage – Page 13 – Waflay Post
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Parenting, Responsibilities To Underage Children

parenting and responsibilities involved

parenting and responsibilities involved

Who Should be responsible for underage children?

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By definition of  underage, it depends on each country or we should go global perspective which defines an underage person to be below eighteen(18) years of age.

To some parents, a child is a child whatever the age the person is. It also depends on the income status- working or jobless, dependent or independent etc. They see it as duty or responsibility to provide care, love and encouragement until the person moves out to begin a new life…

But we have another category of parents who have no time for their children. They do not even have a clue what children do when alone out there. And making children feel like strangers at home.

To them, children are like the worst liability that comes in life and they seem not to care about children go about in their private life.

We see children as young as below the age five (5) going to school unaccompanied or worse, playing dirty games with other children.

When we come to the use electronics, children might be accessing sensitive information and materials on televisions, internet or in real life without being warned against such behaviors. It is like raring free range domestic animals in your land, what you want to see is that they are free and you have all the time to do what you want without interference from anything or anyone.

Sad that when the situation gets out of hand, that is the time one will run trying to salvage the situation when already too late.

As a parent, it is your responsibility to know your child better than anyone else out there. Try to control what they see, feel and hear as much as possible.

Caring for a growing child is fun, but sometimes it gets nasty. Having a loving heart brings everything inline with your desires for that child. Your future and your child’s life in future is determined by what you do to it when young. Parental love should be the leading aspect in raising children, nothing other.

 

Marriage Institution, What Is Expected Of You after Love

Is it love that keeps marriage intact and peaceful?

At one point in marriage life, you might feel neglected, lonely and the link between the two of you cut short by unknown forces.

What would you do if you find yourself in that situation? First, you have to understand that nothing you are facing is new in this institution called marriage. In fact, other people have felt even worst experience than you have. Be yourself and act upon chances that might bring in good relationship. Some of them are;

  1. Avoiding anger when handling marital issues

-Anger solves nothing in this world and you should not expect it to work in your marriage either. Having short temper is not good… control how you feel and do not let your feelings ruin your chances of solving marital issues.

  1. Creating a channel of communication

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-There is no relationship that can survive if parties involved are not ready to face their marriage problems head-on. Remember, you are one -only that each brain is on a different soul. Therefore, it is up to you to create a link to connect the two, to have a uniform purpose and to level out small differences that might seem huge if not tackled in time.

  1. Playing your part so well to eliminate loopholes in your part

-Before you point out whatever that you dislike from him or her, are you clean that the other party has nothing to say about you? Think very well before you make a move… sometimes rushing for a negative point of view in your marriage partner can turn disastrous. Oops! No one likes the truth.

  1. Thinking positive that all will be well.

-All is well! A short sentence stolen from a Bollywood movie, 3 Idiots, can be helpful in your struggle to save your marriage. Dueling in negative thoughts will stress you up for nothing… Be positive in mind and work upon what you know about your partner.

Secondly, do you trust your marriage partner? It is up to you now to think of a better way to go after the loose ends. You know him or her better than anyone else does. You can exploit the weaknesses and seen how it goes. If you see changes in your partner that you do not like, point them out… ask questions and you should be ready answer some that your partner might be having for you. Remember, no one is perfect! Do not even pretend to be perfect in marriage.

Another thing that you have to consider is tolerance. It is only in marriage that people do stupid things and get away without being accountable for them. Yes! It might be annoying to keep correcting his or her mistakes, but learn to put up with it or talk about if you want the person to change.

In what I understand, Love is that thing that brings different people together, but what keeps the marriage going are simple things you do for each other.

Happy Love time!

 

The Act of Forgiveness in Marriage

When two lover birds are in a union in marriage,it’s hard to evade mistakes done by one partner to the other.

Depending on the individual some will opt to forgive the ‘wrong’ done ,forget and move on. But there are others who will not forgive,get off that marriage and at the same time swear to make the partner pay one day.

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But  those who forgive their partners, say that they do it for the love that  they have for their partners and also due to the fact of how they cherish their marriage.

I have some scenarios where marriage mistakes have been forgiven;

For this man,he had been married to his wife for six years and the wife conceived with another man.The fact that she confessed was enough to make him take her back and since they were legally married in church wedding and they still loved each other very much.

Another man also confessed that he forgave his fiancee while they were still in college after she conceived with another man.He felt that with a child involved,it would not be good to abandon her.  Then after 11 years in marriage ,her infidelity made her test  HIV positive while for him he tested negative. He finally decide to marry her legally in church hoping that she would eventually change.

But for those who could not forgive based their argument on how responsible the person will be, not to repeat the same mistake again.

In fact one had to support this; his wife cheated on him with his best friend and he forgave her. However, she did it again with his work mate and so he broke up with her since he could no longer trust her whatsoever.

It’s good to forgive in marriage but what matters more is if  it’s worth to continue living as a couple.

As we have read in the above examples of forgiveness, we find that some people are forgiven and later lead a straight life, however we have other who go on repeating the same mistake. My question is, how many times are you willing to forgive your unfaithful lover?

 

 

Youth and Marriage

Marriage is the most fulfilling relationship and can at the same time be the most hurting relationship.

Choosing your partner well is the foundation for a good marriage.But to the youth,choosing is the most neglected part when one is settling down to marriage.

It’s better to fall in love to someone who is your friend.

Qualities to look for in your partner before settling down to marriage

1. Can you accept one another as partner?-You can’t change your partner and should be ready to accommodate the differences that you have.As a partner don’t promise to change if you know it’s hard for you to.

2. Do you like each other?-Liking is more basic than loving.If he /she is your ideal friend then you are able to share secrets.

3. Are your values comparable?-This is being open/honest with each other values that is there are no reservations in your relating together.That is there is mutual respect,responsibility,loving/caring.

4. Are you comfortable with the way you express your feelings to your partner?

5. Are you comparable in how you look at life?-That is whether your partner is an optimistic positive partner or a pessimistic negative person.

Factors that young people should consider before marriage

1. Marriage as a teen is a known risk factor for divorce.-Marriage is best for partners who are at an age that they can be responsible for themselves.

2.The more partners are similar in terms of principles,background and goals,there are high chances that the marriage can in the long run be fruitful.

3.Education background-Partners who are educated to maybe college level have high chances of successful marriage.this is due to their diverse exposure to different environment.

4. Marriage helps to generate wealth and income.-People who are in marriage may be economically better off.

5. It’s important to know how you got to know your partner.The most likely places is through introduction by a family member or a friend or through acquaintances.

6. Living together before marriage is not fruitful.

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