How will I able to Survive This?

I only realized today that I am running out of money. I checked my earning on my call review site and compared it to my plans for this week. It is half way to the quota I planned to achieve,  what happened to me? Maybe I was looking on different quota. I thought I achieved it, but it’s not. I am a failure. Yes, I was looking on a different quota. I thought the one that I was checking all the time was the last leaf of my mini notebook, but it is not and there is something written on the back of it. Oh no!! Palm facing!

I noted the word Papa’s birthday and Mother’s Day. Oh no, palm face again. I made that quota because we are celebrating my Father’s birthday at the last week of May and Mother’s day on the second week of May. How can I able to bring out something without a money. I haven’t started my new job too and I don’t know when I will start it. I know it is not too late to earn, but if I will start next week on my new job, which I am telling you will not happen because I able to talk about it again (whenever I am talking about a future plans, it never happens, especially if I take down notes or I shared it on my blog, of course, it is weird and there is no jinx, but I guess I am exception), I cannot earn the quota amount. If I will try it next week, I need to work double time. What double time when I am running out of time? Am I panicking? Lord have mercy!

I am now ready to readjust the plan for next week, but I know I will not able to do anything to increase it. No matter how I will put a lot of effort, the decrease of earnings of Blogjob is one of the reasons why the earnings will get a big decrease and I am frustrated right now.

God have mercy.


Photo from Pixabay

Lingering your dream after you wake up

Have you ever dream about something and it was all good you want to stay with it? Have you ever done something that made your dream to have a continuation? I have lots of dreams that were able to continue. I only wake up in between and the story continues. However, how about something that you really want to continue, have you got your success of making the story continue?

I did. I have this dream about seeing the person I admired in my dream. In my dream, it was amazing. It was the most amazing thing because I able to come closer to him and even talked to him. What I love about is that I was seeing the same face. You know when we have this dream, sometimes we are aware who are we at on that dream. We know the person we are with but sometimes as the story moves, they change their face and they become a different person. In that dream, from the first part to the second part, he is the same person.

On the first part, I was with him in this amusement park and he was telling me that riding a rollercoaster is not bad, but I was shaking my head. He insists and even persuaded me while we were having rounds on the amusement park. I thought it was long but I am aware it happened fast. I woke up in between the parts. I opened my eyes and closed it again. The second part was on the part that we are strolling around and choose Ferris Wheel to ride. We entered it and I was closing my eyes because I am scared of heights. He holds both of my hands and let me see the view. He asked me to breathe in and out before looking down. I able to checked my surrounding and I was okay. The last part was when we were talking about rabbits and that was really weird. I woke up maybe after it because that is the last part of the dream I remember.

If you are aware of a dream and you really like it, you can still linger on that dream by only doing this. If you start to get aware that you get awaken, do not make any move, just stay in the position you are in. Do not ever move and for sure you can continue on that dream.

On the other side, if you have a bad dream, once you get awaken, get up from the bed and shake it off so that when you start sleeping again, it will be a different dream this time.


Photo from Pixabay

Sleeping Help us Learn

Sleeping makes us learn, this is tried and tested by me. I only realized this when I was started working. When I was in college, during the time I was reading school notes, I never thought sleeping about it will able to help me learn it. I remember one time in college, I hardly understand this certain topic about Radio Isotopes. I hate that subject but I have the interest to learn. I told myself, I was having a hard time learning about Nuclear Chemistry but I able to survive that subject, so I could do the same  with Radio Isotopes. When I am home, I tend to review everything I learned in class. It becomes a habit for me to reread everything at home because I want the learning to stay for long in my brain.

While relearning it again, there will be some part that will make it difficult to me. I will drain my brain remembering what does suppose to mean. I will take a nap after being exhausted and frustrated. Then once I wake up and reread it over again, I suddenly realized I can able to understand everything. I don’t know if this is something to do with straining my brain because I tend to force myself to learn during the waking hours and happens to do with refreshing my brain when I am having a nap that makes everything clear this time.

When I was working, during the time that I was having difficulty with decisions of work, I remember to apply napping. I nap in between trying to solve a problem. Once I woke up, I will think about it again and then everything gets clear, little by little. Sometimes problems even entered my dreams and it able to solve it there. I try to remember what happened in my dream. Sometimes it went out successful, sometimes not. But one thing is for sure, there will be something new. There will be some fresh ideas to help me out solve the problem.

At present, even not ideal and even if I can’t do it sometimes, I try to nap in between thinking about a problem because it is tried and tested that it will able to help me with a decision.


Photo from Pixabay


I Never Thought I am having a Lucid Dream

If you happen to read my post in this dream I able to talked about that I felt my dream. I dreamt about centipedes throwing at me and I felt it. I felt how the centipede crawls on my head and I can also feel those who are crawling on my back. I never thought that this has something to do with Lucid Dreaming. Lucid dreaming is the ability to control your dreams. However, on that dream, I am not sure if I able to control my dreams. I just know what to do. That I can do what I have to do. Is that the part that I control my dream?

Again, Lucid dreaming is the ability to control your dreams, a way of dreaming where you can able to observe what is happening. You have a sense of awareness, you can able to use your five senses, sense of hearing, sense of tastes, sense of smelling, sense of feeling and seeing. I wish I can able to use my common sense too, and that is to be able to control my dream. I became thinking if I able to control it. I know I became aware that they will throw the can to me but I can’t define and be specific if running out from people around me during that time is my decision, because if it is, then I control my dream. If I can control it, how did I do that?

According to a certain article.

“Lucidity occurs during altered states of consciousness when you realize you are dreaming – and your brain switches into waking mode inside the dream.” – Credits

It means that during that time I am still sleeping and in my dream I woke up that is why I able to apply to use my senses, to feel something and to be able to apply a decision on it.

On the other note, how do I able to learn that? I was rummaging through my mind into how many times I able to control everything in my dream and it happened a lot before. How I able to know how to do that? That is what I am about to check and I am very interested to know how I able to do that.

Photo from Pixabay



Dream Meaning: Centipedes

I dreamt about Centipedes this afternoon. It was black and big ones, I can’t forget about the many little feet and the sound of it. I was scared. Centipede will be one of the reasons of my death for sure. It is one way to heart attack. I don’t want to see one and it is one perfect example of stress for me. When I see one in the bathroom, I kill it or I splash it with water. Once it moves, I am screaming and jumping and for sure I will be gone in the scene. That is something I don’t want to happen in my everyday life, same goes with worms, and especially with all kinds of snake.

I checked the meaning of Centipedes and it says about some situations that you find unpleasant and you don’t want it to happen again. If you look at my first paragraph that is exactly what I said. I don’t want it to happen again. So from now on I replace the word “unpleasant situations” to “centipedes”. It also associated with feeling bothered that affects your decision or might do a decision on a later time. Unpleasant situations aka Centipedes really annoys me. Appearing in front of me makes me find it out of my control. It is inevitable to happen that is why it is out of control but it annoys me that much. It is like meeting a long time enemy on the road, you cannot see it coming but it could happen one day.

I wonder what exactly annoys me that it reflects on my dream and the appearance of my best friend centipedes happened? Maybe this is about the recent situations that frustrating me for 2 months now and up until now it still ongoing. I wonder when will it end. I guess that is it, the centipede of my life and I am not looking forward on it anymore.


Photo from Pixabay


Do you feel your dreams?

I wonder if my title is right. My post is about, do you have a feeling when you are dreaming. For example, if in your dream you fall in the mountain, do you feel the way you fall? Do you feel the air touching your skin, you stomach rotating inside you before you hit the ground? If you happened to hit the ground, do you feel it too?

I have lots of dreams that I felt. I felt the way I fall in one of my dreams. I even felt when I dream about riding a horse and felt from it. Earlier, I have this weird dreams. I was like inside a house then there were lots of things. It is the owner of the hoarded garbage and kept it inside their house. I am not sure why I was there, what I know is that I am looking for something that belongs to me and it is one of the things that the person’s keeping inside the house. I was rummaging the things and someone put out a can and the can has a lot of centipedes in it. I was shouting because I am afraid of everything crawling. Another one is like centipedes, but not a centipede. It is a kind of crawling monster that has sound. Someone was pushing me to go near it and that person even trying to throw the can at me after learning I was scared. I know what happened next so I jumped and ran fast. Too late that someone throw the can to me while I was running away and I can feel something crawling on my body and on my head.

I really felt it. I was like screaming and don’t know what to do. I felt all were crawling and I know it is the end of me. I woke up and realized it was a dream. I napped again and unfortunately, my dream continuous as when I got out, there are lots of creatures like that outside. I was screaming and I woke up again, I never get back to sleep again.

Sorry, I will not be posting a picture of centipedes, no never!


Photo from Pixabay


Lotto Winner, What will you do with that Big Amount?

Things happen for a reason and I am very intrigued to know what is the reason why there is a winner of 6/45 National Lottery yesterday. There is one winner of the amount P44,258,488.00. These are the winning numbers  44-33-45-23-11-37 . First of all, Congratulations? Second, what are your plans for the money? Third, I wonder why you won, not on the bitter site, but I am just curious why a certain person wins a certain big amount. What are God’s plans for them knowing that this one is one form of gambling? What will happen to the money and why it is happening?

Do you wonder it too? Do you wonder they win and you are not? But first, you need to bet in order to win because you can never win without betting.

My parents were addicted to betting in Lotto, however, at present, since the time that they found out that there is alleged manipulation of the results before the actual results, they stop betting from it. However, they have a new one and it is called Loteng and I will not say more about it. Just for tonight I learned that their numbers were fighting. The results of today’s lottery for 6/42 are  28-11-01-02-17-09. According to my father, they have four numbers there. I wonder if there is a prize for that when it comes to Loteng. When they bet for Lotto, they surely win something for tonight.

Is frustration leads people to bet in a lottery? You cannot deny that there are people who could win something and the perfect example is the one winner for yesterday’s draw. I really wonder why he or she won? Does he or she have a lot of problems lately that the only way to solve it is to win the lottery? There is always a reason for this and all I know is that they are so lucky to win it. What I hope in the future is that the person who wins the lottery is the person who has the way to share the blessing to people who need it, like ME. lol.

Photo from Pixabay

Oh Mama Dear we’re not the Fortunate ones, and Girls Just wanna have fun!!

I wrote the title from the lyrics of the song Girl’s Wanna Have Fun. It is the one that I am listening right now and it is giving me certain positive vibes, oh lalala. Don’t mind, I could be very weird at times, or maybe I can say being weird is my normal and being normal is my strange part.

Truly, we are not the fortunate ones, but being fortunate has its own meaning and it depends on how you perceive life. I do believe I am fortunate on some things, but not quite enough. On the note that I want to have fun because I am a girl trapped in a body of a fat lady, I really want to have fun. I want to have fun that will make my soul smiling and breathing. Just like what Cyndi Lauper did in the video where she gathered a lot of people in the road to get through her house, exactly to her bedroom. I was laughing when I saw a pizza man, did they literally ordered a pizza while they are busy dancing in the streets, towards the house?

I enjoyed this video. It is quite simple to explain how to start a fun. It maybe looks crazy on some but this has certain good vibes in it and the reason is because it has Cyndi Lauper in it. At 0:07 in the video I am laughing as she made her entrance. It was fast so you better be looking at it. Below this post I will share the video. This is for the sake of the people who haven’t watched it.

Nah, there is nothing special with the video. It is just that it has a lyrics that has fun, the story in the video is fun and funny, it is just fun overall. Before I forget, I love the orange hair and the different shades.

Look at 0:39 the mother did not noticed she broke the egg on her shoulder!


Photo and video from CyndiLauperVEVO at YouTube

Tired like this….

Look at the picture that is exactly how I feel after finishing 3 blogs for today. I am not sure if I will able to finish it all. I feel tired. My eyes are dropping. I know I had slept for 6 hours and now I feel the need to do it over again, lol. I am a person who has plans, I always have it with me. I am not putting it on writing but I have plans in my head and I am doing it. However, I do not set a time. That is the problem of not setting time because I do not wish to fulfill everything as quickly as possible.

I was doing my 4th blog when I opened YouTube and started crying, nope, of course, I am only joking. I opened YouTube to starts singing again. I started singing the song from Natalie Imbruglia Torn. That is what I certainly feel, “Nothings fine I’m torn, You are already late, I’m torn”. Sorry for doing the drama. The only thing that is real is my clothes has a lot of tear and cuts on the side, so that is what Torn is all about.

Now I am checking the next song on the playlists, it is Ironic. I cannot wait to sing it, yey! Then the next on the line is All the Love in the World from Corrs, A Thousand Miles from Vanessa Carlton, I will sing it all!!

That is exactly me when I am tired. I do things that I do not plan to do. I will look for the things that make me enjoy and it will shift my mood. I hope I able to grasp some positivity with the selection of songs in the playlists. Sometimes it is positive, but sometimes I enjoyed singing that I forget about blogging. Hopefully, I find topics that will able to share again.


Photo from Pixabay


Childhood Memories and Trees

Part of my childhood memories are staying under the tree. One of the best vacation I had was when we lived for 2 months at my Auntie’s house, just beside my grandmother’s house. I spent my time mostly under the tree, climbing the tree, picking the fruit from the tree, cleaning the fallen leaves under the tree, marking a territory on the bark of the tree and spending time with trees that I could reach.

I love trees. I hide from it when I want to prank some of my cousins. Trees able to witness how good my voice is, lol. Trees able to know my aspirations, my dreams, my frustrations, if they are a person, they could blackmail me with all my secrets. Trees are always been there for me when I need someone to listen to the troubles I have in mind. The air they share to me is the one that serves as their tight hug. They hug me after my sharing and now I do believe they could be a good psychologist or psychiatrists for listening to my drama.

Trees saw me bump in a stone and hurts myself in the process. They don’t help me. Of course, when they started to move and help me to stand up I will be in shock and they will never see me again, lol. I always loved trees. I love green things. I love grass too. I love everything with color green as it calms me. It calms my brain and my eyes. Trees exactly give me enough air to breathe. It is my saviour during the bad times. I only need a place that will able to allow me to share what I feel at the moment and it always makes me feel relaxed after it. I wonder why people cut it. I don’t understand why do we need to get rid of the things that give us healthy air to breathe in.


Photo from Pixabay