Turn back time

It’s not you it’s me! Probably the line that I have to say to him. I don’t know what exactly I am feeling right now. I feel like I am all alone in this fight. And I feel like I don’t need anybody else to be with me. This is my war. And I am battling with too many people around me.

I feel underestimated at work. I feel neglected and unloved by my parents. He makes me feel useless and stupid. I feel like I need a little more time and space to breathe. It suffocates me knowing that all the burdens are on my shoulders.

When I thought that he should be at my side no matter what. He always makes me feel stupid. My words aren’t important to him. What he just wants is to be heard but he never knows how to listen. How I wish I could turn back time. Continue reading

Customer Relation

As for my personal point of view having an excellent customer relation is a must in every industry. We must build a good relationship with our clients so they will be able to trust our service. We should be friends with them as much as possible. Even when we are out of the office we have to deal with them as friends. We should bear in mind that every business won’t be a success without their clients patronizing their products. It’s easy for it to be said but how easy will it be to do? There are times that when a client feels like you’re already a friend, he will think of like he will be your priority once he asks a favor from you. Will it affect your customer relation? Somehow yes. Being too close might lead into misunderstandings. In which sometimes one is going too personal that it will affect the business. Somehow professionalism became questionable on both parties. Some may say that it’s being unprofessional if a client’s account will suddenly be pulled out. Or worst it will affect also the friendship. If both were already friends even before they had business with each other. That’s why it is not advisable to build a business with your closest friend. Because admit it or not money can be a reason for misunderstanding. Specially when you are friends with your business partner. It’s really difficult to separate personal away from business with a friend.

Treat your customer right and they will still loyal to you. And will always use your products and services. In this world nowadays where a lot of competitors are everywhere each business should be able to know how to handle their customer’s right. Keep them aware and updated of your latest products and services and guide them all throughout. Never lose patience on them so they will feel secure with your services.

Good to See Her Again?

It was a day to remember yesterday. I incidentally saw my first ever bestfriend back in my elementary days. I was hesitant to approach her at first since she looks different from the last time I saw her. We stared at each other first waiting for one another to say hello. She did the first move. And when she finally speak I knew it was really her. My long time best friend. I missed her. I really missed her company. She’s with her kids so we haven’t got much time to talk. I can see in her eyes that there’s something bothering her. After a decade it’s just yesterday that I saw her again. All of my memories with her flashes back and I don’t know why I still feel like it was like yesterday that she left me with no reasons at all.

She’d hurt me before. When she left me without even saying goodbye. It was when we are about to go in high school. We planned that we are going to the same school only to find out that she went to a different school. Just when I thought I found a sister in her. She’s gone with the wind as soon as we graduated from elementary. But I still waited for her. I even went at their house before hoping I could find an answer but their landlady said they already moved out. It hurts me so much. I feel rejected at that time. And she just left me alone. I don’t know anyone in the school where I studied high school. I was confident back then that she will be with me so I don’t need to worry. But she left me. So at that time I said to myself I have to face this new journey all by myself. I have to become tough and never let anyone harm me. When we were in elementary we always have each others back and we defend each other to anyone who tries to bully us.

Until yesterday that I saw her. I would love to share more stories with her. But we are both in a hurry and her kids are getting bored. So I asked for her number and told her that I will text her. But then again I am hesitant to reach out on her again. I can still feel the pain and the rejection she made me feel back then.  Maybe if she really wants to get in touch with me she should have asked my number instead of giving her number to me. I don’t know if it is right to get in touch with her again. I am afraid that if ever we’ll be close again she will leave me again without a good bye.

NO

Just like what Meghan Trainor’s song entitled “No”. We should be able to say No when we think that it is already getting abusive of you. It’s okay to help but sometimes when we feel like it’s already out of our control and we are being abused we shouldn’t let it happen. Stop saying yes. Though it might be hard to say No when you are being used to say yes all the time. We should realized that we can’t do anything. We are only humans who can make mistakes and we are not perfect. There will be times when we feel like we need to slow down and rest. There maybe times when we too need help from someone. It is not just us who should help others but admit it that we too might be in need. It’s a great feeling to be of help. But when it seems like it’s too much we should also learn how to say No to the one who’s asking our help. Because if we kept on saying yes all the time, they will get used to it and they might abused you. They might misinterpret it when the time comes that you will be saying No for the first time. Because they are not to used to hear that from you. I mean when somebody already expects you to help it might be difficult for you to get out of that scenario. The tendency is that somebody might judged you like you have changed or they might say that you are becoming selfish or so that you are now rejecting to help them.
Being kind is different from being stupid. Sometimes being so kind makes you look like stupid that’s why there are people who are becoming abusive. Learn to say No when you simply can’t do them a favor or when you think they can resolved their problems by themselves. Don’t let them depend on you too much. Because it might become your problem in the end.

Bashers of Pacquiao

I’m wondering why there are a lot of people criticizing our boxing champ Manny Pacquiao saying he cannot be in the Senate. I believe that Pacquiao is a good example, a good leader with an intelligent mind. We may see him punching on a boxing ring but he cannot win any fight if he’s not thinking. He gave us pride until such time he retires. I think boxing is not all about his punches. It’s the strategies he puts through it. He cannot just punch without thinking. He should hit his contender thinking that it will get knocked down and lose the fight. Pacquiao made us proud a couple of times and that signifies how genius he is doing a strategic plan for a specific fight. He should be able to deliver his very best to be able to win a fight. That’s why he went thru a rigorous training so as before his fight he should be in good condition to get into the ring.
So whoever says that Manny doesn’t deserved a seat in the Senate he better think twice. Manny may look like naive but we shouldn’t be seeing him from his outside appearance rather we should see his pure intention to help us, and our country. He’s one of the people who made our country known to others so why hesitate to vote for him? I believe he’s a good man and a good leader as well. He can deliver and will definitely make a change. He doesn’t need money to be a corrupt. He already has the money to share with the poor and needy. I have heard him speak and he really has a very good point of views and honestly, I was once like others who doubted him at first but when I heard him speak he really has only good intentions why he’s running for the Senate.
Anyway, we all have our own opinion so it’s still up to us who deserves our vote.

Superhero

You can’t be a superhero even if you want to or even when you feel like. We all have our weaknesses. And sometimes though we feel like we are becoming superhero on someone we can’t simply consider ourselves like one. Why? Because superheroes are just superficials. You can only be one if you think you are. But it’s just a fiction. Like superman or batman or even wonder woman they don’t really exist in real life. So don’t act like one. You can’t be too good on anyone. Or you just can’t simply speak flawlessly. You may sound hypocrite if you do that. We are all born with different approaches in life. And the way you see life can’t be the same as with others. You can embrace life to be good on you. Because you have so many things to be thankful for. You are blessed. While there are some who aren’t as blessed as you are. So you speak words of wisdom and holiness. But remember we aren’t living in the same world you’re living with. I think it’s best to put yourself into someone else’s shoe so you’ll realize where is he coming from? You may not know it until you experience it yourself.
Turn around and you’ll see how lucky you are from others. So you may be able to think twice before you speak. Maybe then you’ll realize and say, “Oh now I understand why you felt that way”. You see it’s so easy to advise when you are not in the position. But sometimes let’s be sensitive enough not to judged somebody because of what he become. You are just human who can also make mistakes. Who once failed and tried to catch up. So we shall not argue for anything that someone is dealing with.

To unwind?

I wanted to break free. Sometimes I feel like I needed some time to relax from all the issues I’ve been dealing with. To just free my mind even for a day without thinking of anything but to relax and unwind. Say no to stress and just be carefree. However, I feel like I have no right to be in that mood. Even if I wanted to relax I really have to deal with my problems because if I just left it unresolved then that will be too much of my problem. I might not be able to handle it anymore.
I always daydream of going out of the country or even out of town with no worries at all including the expenses it may incur. If only I can afford to do that or if ever there will be somebody I know who’s willing to take care of all the expenses. But sorry that I don’t know anyone who can do that for me.
We all need to work so hard to be able live a kind of life that we want. In my case, I always put my kids on top of my priorities. Every Sunday I make it a point that it’s a mass and family day. Even if it means I will be broke for the following days. I just wanted them to give what they want but only if I can afford. I think they deserved it. And my point of view is that I am working for them so why not spend it with their wants and needs?
Sometimes life can be stressful. But seeing them smile helps me to handle life on a lighter note. Even when I feel so tired and restless I only look at them and ask for their hugs and kisses makes me feel alright and just continue to work hard for them. Sometimes I really don’t know the meaning of “to unwind”.

Failed to Reach my Daily Limit Points

Oh well, can we really achieve our goals here? To reach our daily limit everyday? As in everyday? As for me, I am having a hard time accumulating my daily limit. As much as I want to I can’t just easily sit down and focus in here. I have a regular job in the morning and always comes home late at around 7pm. As I come home I still have to check how my kids are and sometimes I teach them some lessons in Math and English. I wanted to register them before in a workshop or summer class so they won’t get bored at home during vacation. But my problem as always is that I don’t have a nanny to watch over them, to bring them to their workshop or summer class if ever. Now I was asked by my niece if she can be the one to bring my kids to school while she’s also in a vacation, that is somehow a good news to me. Since I cannot find one who’s willing to do that. She said while she’s waiting for her class to open sometime in August she is willing to watch over my kids. So I said of course yes! It’s timely for the opening of June class for my kids. However it’s already late for my kids for any workshops or summer class since it will be over soon. From where I inquired workshops will only lasts for about 2 weeks and will end up on April 30. It’s a sad news. But anyway, I still got the good news that even for just a few months I already find someone to bring my kids to school.
Another thing why I cannot write for more here is that my work does not allow me to do more than blogging. To create blogs need more of thinking, you really have to focus so you could write a sensible blog. So even when I can earn 300 daily points for a day I still can’t do that for those reasons.

So Tired and Sleepy

I am so tired both body and mind. I had sleepless nights for the past few days. A lot to think of and lot of work to do. Since I am currently assigned to encode all export declarations of one of our clients, the files to encode never ends. My hands and back aches so much that is also the reason why I have sleepless nights. I feel like I am already having humps at my back. I’m finding it difficult to stand and walk straight. I feel like I am going to fall anytime as my back seemed to become weak that it cannot support my whole body.
Have you ever experienced like this? When all you wanted is just to sleep and rest and yet you just cannot go straight fast asleep? Aside from that the people around you creates noises and too restless. Sometimes it makes me feel like screaming that I really wanted to sleep so please let me sleep! However there are some who are really insensitive. And which I think I can’t really change it.
And again tonight, as much as I want to sleep I know I still cannot. So while waiting for my time to let everybody sleep first before me I decided to blog for more instead of staring at nowhere and think of all my problems. I know I can’t resolved any just by thinking of it. I might go crazy to think about it over and over again. So my motto for now, “come what may”. If it is fate then so be it. I already gave it all up. My life today, tomorrow and my future, just let it be. I don’t want to plan anymore since as I kept on planning it never came to happen. So why do I have to waste my time thinking about it? Just let it go and let it be! For now I am so tired and sleepy but still can’t rest till all of the people here are already asleep.

Job Orders

I keep on searching online for any job orders available in POEA’s (Phlippine Overseas Employment Administration) website hoping I could find a job for my partner. Actually, I am hesitant to find one for him because I feel like he’s not interested anymore to go abroad. So I am also trying to find one for me. However, my heart is in doubt if I can leave my kids at their young age. I don’t know if it will be worth it to work abroad for a bright future. I wanted to bring them too if ever I will find a good job that fits me in. If I will be given a chance I will secure their future first. While they are still young and their schooling is still free I have to save for their senior high school or a college degree. I want them to bring in a good school where they can really learn and developed their skills and minds. This is a responsibility of every parents. I am thinking that while I still can work and my kids are still young this will be the best time to save money for their future. If I am just going to stay here I cannot save and I cannot invest on something. Other than their schooling I also wanted to build my own house to secure my kids for their shelter and build houses for rent too. So whatever happens to me I know I left them secure and stable.
All what’s on my mind are all for my kids future. They are my life and the reason why I breathe. I’m afraid that they will regret that I am their mother because I haven’t given them a good life. So I think it’s about time to plan for their future not for mine but for my kids. Just as what I always prayed for, I surrender these all to God.