Speaking the words of a mother, when we received the wing of the news our daughter was pregnant with her first child, we were so happy and filled with joy for her. Although we may had our differences in the decisions she made in life we loved our daughter unconditionally. There are times that parents need to step back and allow their children to make mistakes for them to learn and grow from them
We did not approve of our daughter living with a man. Raising our daughter we felt we did our best so we thought to make wise choices. We sit down having a long mother and daughter chat on the topic about pregnancy. In our conversations together she asked questions, I have always tried to answer her questions to the best of my ability and honesty as I knew how. I tried to teach my daughter that she ought to wait to have sex before marriage. She was always a good girl have never gave me any series behavior problems but that all change when she a boy where she worked that came from a broken home and lived in foster care half his life.
It wasn’t the fact him being in a foster care that was my concern. My concern was the reason he was placed in the foster care. The young man had series issues and bad behavior problems where his father could not handle him no matter how hard he have tried. His father worked hard every day to provide for his family. So when my daughter was introduce to this young man and he brought him to the house to meet my husband and I, we had a bad gut feeling calling a parent intuition that the young man had severe behavior problems. One thing about him we noticed he had a very hot temper and drank a lot. When he would go off the wall, so to speak, he would throw things. That frighten us. We allow her to date him with strict supervision but when she turned eighteen and moved out of our home we were no longer in control of the decisions she would make from therein.
My heart ached for our daughter to allow her to go through pain and heartaches and hardships that this young man would put her through and how he treated her. One fall day she stopped in to visit to share the news with her dad and I that she was pregnant. Because of the chaos in her home that she live with her live in boyfriend, she went into early premature labor and delivered our granddaughter at 30 weeks I believe it was on December 24, 2000. Her little girl only weighing one pound but she lived for thirteen days in the NICU. January 6, 2001, the doctors called the family together to talk it over with my husband and I and daughter, the father could not be found. He finally stopped in on December 26,2000, two days after our daughter delivered our granddaughter. Doctors explained that they have tried everything to keep our granddaughter alive but it appear that our granddaughter was just to premature to where she had not have the strength to fight any longer for her tiny body organs was rejecting everything they have tried.
As her mother and father told each family member of the news they held my daughter up in prayer. Sunday, January 6, 2001, we all have gotten to hold our granddaughter to say goodbye. When it came around to me to my turn to hold my tiny granddaughter whose heart valves and lungs and her other organs had not formed properly, I bowed my head prayer and wished there was something more I could offer or do to comfort my daughter and granddaughter. The nurse administered morphine into her IV still connected to granddaughter so she would not have no pain when she taken her final breath. Still holding my granddaughter in my arms, I leaned over to whisper in her tiny ear and whisper these words into her ear, “It is okay angel, for we all will be alright, and take care of your mommy. Before she taken her final breath, she glazed up into my eyes, like she was telling me thank you grandmemaw. The nurse paced her in a tiny doll crochet pink nightgown and a little white bonnet for our tiny angel.
The nurse stated that the crochet night gown was specially made for people for this type of situation. Can you stop and imagine how comforting that was for my daughter and us that we were blessed to created memories with our granddaughter even if it were only thirteen days. We celebrated Christmas with Angel, brought in the New Year of 2001 with her. Very comforting to know we even had total strangers caring for my daughter in such a special way. Nurses eyes filled with tears. I ordered infant receiving blankets to donate to NICU to hand out to other mothers to give to their baby to be placed in Precious Moments box for the parents to have keepsakes to remember their infant babies who were to premature to fight. Our granddaughter Angel was laid down to rest the day before my husband’s birthday so my husband no longer celebrates his birthdays anymore since the death of our granddaughter.
As for our daughter she went back to our granddaughter’s father, he did not change. He still demanding, controlling, high tempter, they still fight tremendously every day. They moved down south so we don’t hear much from her anymore or do we hear the drama, my husband and I are up in age too, we have health issues. We have tried our best to teach our daughter life values, respect, to learn to have confidence, encouraged her to always do her best in life to make wise choices. We have praised her whenever she accomplished her goals in life. Been patient with her when she had sex before marriage and got pregnant. We paid for the hospital bill, we tried to teach our daughter morals, manners, faith, approval to love themselves. To teach her the true meaning of Christian love in the world. When she became the legal age to where she walked out into the world to explore the world, she made some bad turns that have changed her personality and forgot upbringing.
Jesus called us to love God and his people with being the good Samaritan as setting good examples. There are needy people around you and me we meet them every day. Well aware we can’t help everyone that comes in our path needing help but however, we can reach out with our particular gifts, talents, personalities, to try what we can and able to do for ones who comes before us at any given moments. Love heals, Love changes people, Love of the Father touching through us people will be able to sense.