I am once again in an inspiration drained mode and it’s worse than the time before. At least during my last inspiration drainage I had the desire to write and the problem was coming up with ideas. Tonight is worse because I’m missing the desire to write as well. I’ve never understood how full-time bloggers have a continual flow of ideas because I swear that’s not humanly possible. I write when there’s something that needs to be said or something that I need to get out of my mind. I know writing about being inspiration drained doesn’t seem like something that needs to be written about, but I promise there’s a reason for it.
So I briefly considered how professional writers always seem to have ideas for their latest blog posts. Bear in mind that while I consider myself a writer and a blogger, I don’t consider myself a professional blogger. I speak solely from my own experiences as a sporadic blogger and I would highly recommend that you take these thoughts as such. I offer this disclaimer because I’m going to let you in on a secret. Ready? Bloggers don’t always know what to blog about. Sometimes we have to write posts about being inspiration drained so that we can be inspired (maybe). Those steady streams of posts are what we write when we finally get inspiration. I’m telling you the behind the scenes things that go on in a blogger’s mind so that maybe you realize we aren’t always a bubbling fountain of inspiration.
I never had this problem with blogging, but for every other activity I’ve attempted (and failed!) I’ve had a tendency to beat mysef up over not getting it right the first (or 100,000th) time. If I overcame that hurdle, I would beat myself up for not being dead-on every single time. I bet others have experience this frustration as well. I thought I might e performing my good deed of the day by assuring all of you that whether it’s an active activity or sitting in front of the computer blogging, it’s okay not to be perfect and it’s okay to be drained of inspiration or enthusiasm or whaever else.
By the way, writing about this round of inspiration drainage has not done anything to boost my inspiration. It’s safe to say that some days just aren’t right for blogging.
What is wrong with me? I have decided to use blogging as a way to earn supplemental income, which means that I will blog a considerable amount (keeping in mind that every post needs to be some sort of good quality, even if they’re more therapeutic than hard-hitting). I love blogging. I love writing in general. This should be the easiest task I’ve ever set for myself. Ha! Right now I have no desire to put fingers to keyboard.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s not that I’m hurting for ideas. Right now I have the ideas racing through my mind, fighting each other for which one gets written about first. I shared them on a status update and I’ll repeat them here.
- I could write about the semi-fight I got into with my folks last night when we discussed race/ethnicity/country of origin. They have no idea that it’s weird when you are genetically white (read: the so-called dominant race that is quickly losing that status) but are physically tan and have people asking “What country are you from?” My mom was like “Maybe they’re just trying to start a conversation.” Some conversation starter! If they were really curious, they wouldn’t accuse me of lying when I told them I’ve lived in West Virginia my entire life. I think I would know best about where I live.
- I could write about the career fair today. The new idea is to write about why I’m holding off. Today is the career fair where you’re looking for a long-term career. The student employment fair is coming up on March 2nd. Right now I’m looking for a job, not a career. I’m going to go to the student employment fair so it’s not like I’m talking myself out of anything. I just don’t belong at a career fair until I’m looking for a career. I’ll go to the career fair in my fall semester of college before I’m ready to graduate.
- A new thing I could write about: I sent an email to one of my former instructors about observing her class for an assignment. I haven’t heard anything back and I am terrified. Once I get a response I can talk about where to go from there.
- Another new thing: I just watched a movie trailer for this new apocalyptic horror movie called These Final Hours. I should start collecting upcoming horror movie trailers again.
I have way more ideas than I have available points for the day, but I just don’t have any desire to write! What is wrong with me?